She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
