I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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