don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I want her autograph on my taint
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Randomize
