even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
