why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
