I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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