I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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