the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize
