a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
