yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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