You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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