I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
