i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Randomize
