How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
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