North Korea, Best Korea!
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
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