just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Randomize
