That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize