She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I want a musical about memes.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
