She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
