Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
