Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
