I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
