I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Randomize