K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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