she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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