I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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