is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
