I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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