She's JV to your varsity
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Randomize
