bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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