Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize