I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize