I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
