birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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