STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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