bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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