This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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