Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize
