i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
