I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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