i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize