check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
