you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
