i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize
