It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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