I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
