Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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