Do vagina's smell?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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