youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
