season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
