OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
