I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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