I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize