my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
