I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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